Parenting/Family Advice, Social Advice

Crazy Mother Must be Confronted

Dear TinyMom,

I got a phone call yesterday from the mother of one of my daughter’s classmates. This woman is known to be difficult, unfriendly and a snob. So I immediately feared that our conversation would be contentious, but to my surprise it was civil and even a little friendly. She was upset about something my daughter had said to her son (they’re both nine), but we talked about it maturely and even got to gossiping a little about one of their teachers. I felt like I’d dodged a bullet, to be honest, but then my daughter came home and I heard the other side of the story: this woman had caught her in the school lobby and chewed her out! I told my daughter the woman was way out of line. But do I now have to call the woman back and say it to her face? She called another mother a cunt in a similar situation.

Sincerely, A Feeling-Tiny Mom

Dear Namesake of Sorts,

I think I knew this woman in high school. She’s friendly when she wants something from you, but don’t you dare say hello to her in the hallway the next day. Micro-managing her nine-year-old’s social life is sort of like making sure you know about the party you’re not invited to or that her football-captain boyfriend would never date someone with breasts so small as yours. But can she have the answers to the math homework? This is not a fun person to confront. However, as you obviously already know or your wouldn’t be asking, you absolutely must confront her, if for no other reason than to set an example for your daughter. You should also consider doing it in public:  she’s less likely to call you names (especially such vile ones!) when there are witnesses, and if she starts running her mouth off like she did with your daughter you get to smile and walk away.  Which is not only more gratifying than slamming down the phone or ignoring an email but also the rare reaction that people who think they’re perfect hate. Whichever way it goes, a world of women will applaud you. Plus you’ll feel tall, even if you’re not.

May the force be with you, TinyMom

About TinyMom

TinyMom is Judith Basya, a petite writer whose ten- and seven-year-old daughters are within centimeters of being taller than her. When not driving them places or packing their lunches she writes book reviews and an advice column called "What's Wrong With You" for Though currently residing in Northern California, she's also lived in Manhattan and Southern California and proudly retains the lessons of both. Questions about this blog may be mailed to



  1. Pingback: Who’s Afraid of the Big, Bad Mom? « ask tinymom - May 24, 2012

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Ask TinyMom Archives

Follow ask tinymom on

Join 55 other subscribers
%d bloggers like this: